Honey, I concealed the mortgage

GNU LABOUR

Imagine, if you will, the conversation:

"Honey, can you spare a fiver? I need to pop down to the newsagents'."

"Of course. Here you are."

"Gosh, your wallet looks awfully full."

"Ah, yes, er... it's one of those expanding wallets. It stretches as you put the banknotes in. Gives the impression that it's stuffed full of money, when it isn't."

"How super."

"Yes, I got it in Italy."

Craig Murray is equally sceptical.