King David just scrapes home

There are no users of hard drugs in this picture

LAND OF HOPELESS TORIES

Biggest non-story of the day: Cameron wins by a two-to-one margin.

It seems the Tory voters have been impressed by the media-friendly, youthful, 'cool' candidate (who has never taken any hard drugs, remember), following in the wake of Labour's decision to drop its old crusty image in favour of a hip, modern candidate. Of course that was over ten years ago, but they're slow to catch up, these Tories.

They must be unable to believe their luck: Cameron's under 40, has a full head of hair, has a disabled child, knows what a Slippery Nipple is, likes to get down to the latest beats, drinks and smokes, used to work in television, and has never taken any hard drugs. And his wife is pregnant. And has a tattoo.

Yet he has impeccable Tory credentials: Eton and Oxford, a long line of politicians in the family, stockbroker father, viscount father-in-law, economics degree. And he has never taken any hard drugs.

Sadly, this may be a good day for Conservative Party democracy, but it's a bad day for British democracy. We now have two party leaders who are prepared to put style before substance, presentation before content and media awareness before public empathy. As if we expected anything else.

Still, I bet there are a few Colombian farmers throwing their hats in the air. Oh, shit, did I say that out loud?



[UPDATE: Jonathan Freedland doesn't think much of Charlie's voting record.]